Happy Valentine's Day!

[piper90npcs]

Who: Rig workers and New Hires
What: Valentine's Day Events
Where: The Rig
When: Valentine's Day
Warnings/Notes: Violence likely.

A. Cupids aren't as cherubic as they appeared in Renaissance-era artworks. The little bastards float with the bodies of babies, but the huge, flatly reflective grey eyes of a cave-dwelling monster and the teeth of a viperfish when they open their mouths to deliver a hideous, staccato cackle. They flit around in the air in clumsy bursts with all of the grace of a concussed mosquito, only remaining upright half the time, but twice as hard to catch. That doesn't change the pinpoint accuracy of their aim, however, as they open fire with arrows of pyrite.

That's another difference in the myths. They don't target people and make them fall in love. They target lovers, or people with crushes, shoot to wound, and feed. Dozens of them careen drunkenly through the halls of the Rig, searching for people who are a little too obvious about their unspoken desire for affection. When caught, they squall like babies, then try to take a chunk out of their captor with their vicious mouths, opening far wider than a normal baby should be able to manage. Fortunately, they don't seem to be more durable than most babies, though their appearance and cries are enough to put off many Rig workers from a solution more permanent than trapping them in a closet or under a crate.

---

B. "It will be darling," Sharon says, smiling. "Do it." Despite the honeyed words of previous arguments, this time it's backed by steel. She smiles and casually knocks a cherub out of the air with a blast of rock salt, followed by a few vicious, but loving ('It's all about love,' she says. 'Jesus wants it that way.') strokes with the butt of her shotgun. "It's for morale, dear. Management thinks that it will help you all bond and realize that things aren't so bad here. You know, get you involved in some normal activities." She pauses, then whacks the little beast one more time. "...It twitched. Now, shoo. This box has all of the lace and paper you'll need. Even some gluesticks. But, please, be a dear and don't let Mac have too much paste. You know how he gets, bless his heart."

Yes, that's the official stance of Jorgmund. Mac can have a little glue, as a treat. On holidays. And, as promised, everything is there. Glue, pens, sparkly glitter, safety scissors, paper, and a load of candy message hearts, 'for inspiration'. There are even a few examples, addressed to Sam, to show the 'less fortunate' New Hires how to do it.

Of course, given that they're supposed to be doing it in between their regular chores and clearing out cherub corpses, Jorgmund doesn't exactly have high hopes. But an attempt is being made.

---

C. It was wheeled out from the darkest depths of collections. Large. Looming. Non-functional. It was only with much cajoling that they could even get Brainiac 5 to touch the thing, for reasons that become clear as soon as the computer boots up. It proudly proclaims itself to be property of Brainiac 5 and the Legion of Super Heroes, but not one that anyone here has ever been a member of.

They'd probably remember a computer dedicated to kissing, after all.

Yes, one of the public events planned for this year's Valentine's is finding the Perfect Smooching Partner, and Brainiac 5's Love Machine (Demands for rebranding were curtly refused) will help the world find their match... within the Rig, of course. When two people kiss, it tracks technique, passion, and the lighting of the brain's pleasure centers to rate their kiss on a scale of 1-100. Once everyone in a group has kissed at least one other partner, it collates the data collected and rearranges their images onscreen to show their true best match.

Security's already gotten involved and the only reason that the entire event hasn't been shut down is because there's money being passed around on who starts the next fight. Things have already gotten violent more than once and a Security officer's already been sent to Medical for a busted nose.

The New Hires aren't being forced to participate, but there's definitely a few very interested workers lined up, popping some breath mints, and straightening their shirts.

---

D. The banner reads "Speed Work-Appropriate Platonic Friendship/Networking" because, after all, relationships are forbidden by Jorgmund. Nevermind that half the crew is hooking up with each other, workers are expected to be married to the company, and the company is a jealous mistress. That doesn't stop some enterprising individuals from trying to make the most of the situation, as Mr. Sagittarius would undoubtedly cheerfully inform you if he could read these words. But since he can't, you don't have to imagine his smug little grin. Bonus.

Several tables have been laid out in rows, with lonely men and women seated at each one. These include several New Hires. The other side of the table seats include other workers, including several other New Hires, who get up and leave every eight minutes (Or ten posts), moving one seat down. The idea is that they'll take this time to bond with one another, find commonalities, and strike up a lifelong friendship. They've been offered a list of starter questions as possible starters, filled with corporate-approved humor that wouldn't make it into Reader's Digest.

One thing's clear, though. The people that haven't been forced into this, at least the Rig worker side anyway, are honestly extremely lonely people who are desperate for any connection that doesn't come from a plastic smile. After all, there's only about a thousand people on the Rig at any given time and many of them are stuck in jobs deep in the bowels of the machine that offer little chance for socialization. Even the workers that were married, grandfathered in before the harsher fraternization codes were put in place, rarely see their spouses or children aboard due to conflicting schedules.

Every now and then there's a gunshot from the background as someone takes another potshot at a cupid.

Comments

[bothbarrels]

[ Mystified, North does so, obeying the touch of York's hand. ]

[infailtration]

[ York shifts, lifting his head off the pillow and leaning forward, careful not to jostle his shoulder. It brings them much closer together, mere inches apart as he tilts his chin up and looks straight into confused blue eyes. That actually makes him grin a little. Come on, North, you've kissed people before. Still, he brushes their noses together first, working up to it. It feels... important. Defining. ]

[bothbarrels]

[ Now he knows York's not rejecting him. Quite the opposite, in fact. He closes his eyes when York brushes his nose with his, and then he closes the gap between then, pushing his lips against York's. ]

[infailtration]

[ It's not a rejection, for sure, and it's rapidly becoming not just an assessment, either. Because there are sparks even with North's mouth closed, keeping things chaste. York takes a shallow, shuddering breath and parts his lips, sucking lightly on North's bottom lip to see if he'll deepen the kiss. ]

[bothbarrels]

[ North does so, parting his lips and touching York's tongue with his. This whole situation has come upon him so quickly and he's still aching from the bites he received, and that reminds him there's still those things out there. He opens his eyes briefly to glance in the direction of the door. According to the guy on the network, this is exactly the sort of situation they'd be attracted to.

He can feel the sparks, notices that York hasn't been holding back in any manner of speaking, and he hums out a sound of appreciation, releasing York's hand to encircle his body with his arm. ]

[infailtration]

[ This isn't the time or place to hold back, in York's view. North's arm wraps around him but it doesn't hurt so he presses in a little more, their chests brushing as he keeps kissing. It's been a long time since he's kissed anyone, and far longer since it felt this good.

Yeah, he's doomed.

Because of course they'd realize what they're feeling on a rig with tighter restrictions than even the MoI. And he still hasn't fully wrapped his head around what demi means, but if it doesn't keep North from kissing him he's content with it.

What does snap him out of the kiss, which he'd be happy to drag on indefinitely, is a thud against the makeshift barricade. ]

Fuck off, m'busy.

[ He knows it won't listen, but he really doesn't want to get up right now. Maybe it'll just decide it's too much trouble to get in and fly away. ]

[bothbarrels]

[ North snorts out a laugh and just presses back in to kiss York again. Now he raises his arm from where he'd wrapped it around York's waist to frame his cheek with his fingers, stroking the hair at his sideburn. It feels nice to allow their usual affection to be more directed, more tender, more ardent. he'd always enjoyed when they touched, craved it even, the tangling of their limbs as they relax on the bed, the press of their hips as they sit side-by-side.

How had he missed that it was this way for him? ]

[infailtration]

[ York was sure for a moment there that North would be the responsible one and put the brakes on, but he's pleasantly surprised when his friend just leans in closer. And the hand on his face is good, soft and loving and everything York's craved for so long and never realized it could come from North. He should have known, really, he was just so wrapped up in other things it never clicked. Now it just feels right.

He can't lift his right arm and his left is pinned between them but he's kissing back with everything he's got until they need to breathe again, at which point he turns his head slightly to press a kiss to North's palm. ]

We've been idiots, huh?

[bothbarrels]

Completely.

[ His palm tingles where York had kissed him. He brushes his fingertips down York's cheek. ]

[infailtration]

[ York's eyes close again at the touch, as he leans into it like an affection starved puppy. Which he wasn't -- North showed him plenty of affection, just not this. This is better. ]

So what happens now?

[bothbarrels]

[ He continues petting York's face, now growing contemplative. ]

Keeping this on the down-low, I guess.

[ Everyone knew about Remy and Rogue, and about Dan's indiscretions, but there's a certain way to go about flouting the rules. North leans into York's face, not to kiss him now, but to inhale his scent. ]

[infailtration]

Then we'd better stay hidden until the cupids are gone.

[ Though he should probably mention... he exhales, not quite a sigh, and opens his eyes again to look at North. ]

You know I'm still-- I thought they were just attacking me because of Carolina.

[bothbarrels]

[ North pauses, leaning back again. ]

It's okay, York. You don't have to...account to me who you have feelings for.

[ He knows York is free with his emotions, and he knows the history with Carolina. ]

[infailtration]

[ York is absolutely capable of being in love with more than one person, but his concern is more for North. ]

I kind of do, don't I? Since I can't just turn these things on and off, and I don't want to hurt you. We have to talk about this stuff, right?

[ He doesn't like that North leaned away, either, and tries to scoot back in but the sling pulls wrong and-- ]

Ow, damnit.

[bothbarrels]

[ North leans back in, wrapping his arm around to rub lightly at the shoulder that's bothering him. ]

You don't think you'd do anything stupid in the name of it, do you?

[infailtration]

[ York relaxes again marginally when North comes back, resting his head back against the pillow and focusing on the gentle touch. ]

Stupid? Like what?

[ He can't think of anything off the top of his head. ]

[bothbarrels]

[ Instead of answering, North asks: ]

We're...now— This is a thing, right? You and me?

[infailtration]

[ York blinks at him cluelessly for a moment, like he doesn't understand the question. Like he didn't even realize that going backwards after this was an option.

Suddenly that feels like a really huge deal. ]

North, I--

[ Of course it is. He wants it to be, anyway, but part of him is worried about why North would make sure of that first. ]

I want it to be, yeah.

[bothbarrels]

Okay.

[ He says the word on a breath, and it's obvious he's relieved. ]

Doing something stupid means kissing her out of nowhere even though we're together now, or continuing to pursue her, or things like that. I'm...

[ His brow wrinkles a little. ]

I'm a pretty strict monogamist, York. I have trouble with being jealous. I've had breakups over it.

[infailtration]

[ Oh. York needs a second to process that, to figure out what it means for him. ]

I don't... this is what I meant by not being able to turn things on and off. I haven't been pursuing Carolina for a long time, it's just. Who I am with someone I care about.

[ The last thing York wants is to blow this over someone who doesn't even want him, but he's genuinely worried he might screw it up worse later. Possibly without even realizing it. What if North gets jealous and thinks he is pursuing? ]

[bothbarrels]

Let me put it this way, then. It's better if you don't account your emotions toward other people like that. Because of the jealousy thing. You tell me, I start to stew on it.

[ He moves his rubbing hand toward the center of York's back. ]

Make sense?

[infailtration]

[ Wait, no, it doesn't. Well the actual recommendation does, but what North wants from him, less so. To him it's not strict monogamy if there are still feelings there and he wants to be clear about that from the start. ]

Is it a dealbreaker?

[ He asks it quietly, worried he's not getting his concerns across properly but uncertain how to voice them. He probably just looks like a complete asshole. ]

[bothbarrels]

What, your feelings for her, or you wanting to talk about them?

[ He knows York is the type to be free and open with his emotions, which may make this difficult. But difficult is not impossible. ]

York, I just...I just want to try this.

[infailtration]

And I don't want to fuck it up.

[ His brow furrows slightly. ]

Just having them.

[bothbarrels]

[ He leans back in and presses some light kisses along York's hairline. ]

Not a dealbreaker.

[ He mumbles it so quietly that York could be forgiven for not hearing it properly. He twists a couple of fingers into York's hair and combs them through, continuing to kiss him. ]